So, back in 2019, I dropped some heavy news of my mom having this scary cancer.
Mom has months of chemo, and the cancer still grew. But we were lucky, in that her oncologist sent the scans to another surgeon, and that surgeon met with the original surgeon, and the next thing we knew, there was an entire team of doctors working to figure out how to operate. And they did come up with a plan. The scary part was, they weren’t sure she could survive surgery, but it couldn’t be put off because if the cancer grew any bigger, or spread, they wouldn’t be able to operate at all. Mom chose surgery. They scheduled surgery for the end of February.
(Also, we all went to Disney world in February but that’s for another post on another day.)
They took a kidney, a lobe of the liver, some of the intestine, but mom survived. As of right now she is cancer free. We’ve been told that this wasn’t a cure, that this kind of cancer always comes back, and that if she gets 5 more years, that’s doing better than the stats say.
Falling down the rabbit hole 
Wrapping lots of care around you and your mom as you continue to navigate this difficult time.
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Thank you. 💗
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So scary and hard.
I talked to my mom more frankly than I ever had, but it was when she could barely walk needing a walker or scooter. Also her years of smoking had caught up with her causing emphysema which necessitated oxygen 24/7. I chose THEN?
Yes, and there’s a good reason. All the years prior she seemed too much of a presence to talk to, but in a more vulnerable state I must have felt safer. I beat myself up a long time for choosing then, yet it makes sense.
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It makes perfect sense why you chose then to talk to her. I didn’t tell my mom anything when we were in the middle of the cancer crisis, but after it was (mostly) over, I thought about it. I didn’t explore that thought much, because by that time the pandemic had taken hold, everything was locked down and therapy over a video screen was weird and I didn’t feel like Bea was really “there”. Maybe I’ll revisit this later, when I’m not spinning out. Oddly enough, my first thought when I found the pictures on the iPad was to call my mom and ask her what to do. I didn’t, but I think that shows how much she has changed since the cancer crisis.
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OOPS, I read it, “I dropped some news on my mom,” instead of OF my mom. That’s why I shared about an instance with mine, not meaning to suggest you do the same. I often read too fast! You are always so kind anyway… : )
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